BestSelfTherapy.co.uk
In-Person & Online Therapy services


Couples Counselling
✨ Are you struggling with your relationship?
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Are you looking to stay together ? >> just scroll on down
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or looking for a healthy split ? >> read more here
Options for Couples Counselling:
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in-person sessions at the therapy room or in your home
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online therapy via zoom
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Or a mix
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plus post therapy check-in sessions available too.
♡ Staying Together ...
Are you and your partner feeling distant?
Do misunderstandings seem to grow, leaving you both frustrated?
At Best Self Therapy I can provide a safe space for you both to explore your feelings, to overcome your obstacles, and to strengthen your connection.
Couples counselling can help as a protective measure, allowing you both to address issues before they escalate into more significant problems ... a lot of times couples can get caught in a cycle, repeating the same argument ... with different words, only to realise that it's not what's being said that matters but the unexpressed emotions underneath that must be dealt with in order to move forward.
✨ How can therapy help ...
Improved Communication
- learn effective communication techniques, such as active listening, and the use of I statements, allowing each of you to express your feelings and needs clearly and respectfully.
Enhanced Understanding
- encouraging you both to see things from each other's perspective, fostering empathy and understanding, exploring what deep emotional issues or unmet needs that could be causing friction in the relationship.
Navigating Life Challenges
- supporting you both during transitions ... significant life changes - marriage, parenthood, job loss etc... which can all create stress.
Looking at tools to manage stress and help you adapt to changes together.
Conflict Resolution
- identify unhealthy patterns of behaviour and communication that contribute to conflicts, addressing and resolving conflicts in collaboration and leading to more constructive interactions
Rebuilding Connection
- helping you reconnect on an emotional level, enhancing intimacy and trust. Defining your goals for the relationship and reinforcing your commitment for each other.
Individual Growth
- promoting individual self-awareness, helping you both understand your own behaviours, triggers, and emotional needs. Learning to take responsibility for your own contributions to the relationship, fostering personal growth alongside relationship growth.

Green Flags
We've all seen the social media posts and articles everywhere ~
'🚩the red flags to look out for in your relationship'
...but what about the green flags - the positive behaviours.
♡ Here are some of the characteristics that define a healthy relationship. > Mutual Respect - Both partners value each other’s opinions, feelings, and boundaries. They treat each other with kindness and honour each other's individuality. > Trust - There is confidence and faith in each other’s honesty and integrity. Trust reduces insecurity and promotes open communication. > Open Communication - Partners can express their thoughts and feelings freely without fear of judgment or retaliation. They listen actively to one another. > Support - Both individuals support each other’s goals, dreams, and aspirations. They encourage each other during challenges and celebrate achievements together. > Equality - Decisions are made together, and both partners have an equal say in the relationship. There is no dominance or control by one partner over the other. > Healthy Boundaries - Each partner respects the other’s personal space, time, and needs. They understand the importance of privacy and independence. > Conflict Resolution - Conflicts are addressed in a constructive manner. Partners can disagree without resorting to insults or threats, and they work together to find solutions. > Affection and Caring - There is a consistent display of affection, both physical and emotional. Partners show care and consideration for each other’s well-being. > Fun and Enjoyment - Both partners enjoy spending time together and share common interests or activities that foster joy and connection. > Adaptability - Partners are willing to grow and adapt together, recognising that change is a part of any relationship. All of these are contributing to a solid foundation for healthy relationships, allowing both of you to thrive both together and individually.
🔍 Investigation Time ... a couple of tools to get you understanding each other
1. ATTACHMENT THEORY in Couples Counselling
Bowlby's Attachment Theory is a framework for understanding emotional dynamics in a relationship - by knowing yours, and your partner's, attachment styles it can help you both to understand how and why you may respond to conflicts in certain ways.
Have a look through the quiz and the information about the attachment styles and see if helps you to recognise what's actually going on.
2. LOVE LANGUAGES in Couples Counselling
Do you know your primary love language?
Love Languages ... understanding your love languages is a powerful tool for you to navigate your relationships more effectively. It can significantly improve communication, deepen connections and create a more loving environment.
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Words of Affirmation
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Acts of Service
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Receiving Gifts
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Quality Time
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Physical Touch
3. Let's talk Boundaries...
Healthy boundaries are the rules you make for yourself about what's ok and what's not ok, it helps you feel safe, respected, and true to who you are. Healthy boundaries teach people how to treat you properly!
When you don't have healthy boundaries it can affect every part of your life, from your energy, your self-worth, your relationships and your mental health.
Click below to look at
Boundaries x Attachment Theory
Boundaries x Love Languages
Let's get you feeling: Seen + Heard + Valued + Loved + Understood.
Couples counselling can offer you both a valuable opportunity to strengthen your relationship, and to improve communication. By providing a safe and supportive environment, it allows you both to explore your feelings, address unresolved issues, and develop healthier ways to connect.
With my guidance you can gain new insights into your dynamics, learn effective communication skills, and resolve conflicts constructively.
Ultimately the goal here is to foster stronger connections between you, have a deeper intimacy and a more fulfilling partnership, empowering you both to navigate challenges together and build your lasting bond.

A Healthy Split
for when there's an irretrievable breakdown in the relationship ...
✧ Couples Counselling isn't just about staying together ... it can be for when both partners recognise that a healthy split is necessary.
✧ The goal of therapy then shifts away from repairing the relationship to ensuring a respectful and constructive separation.
✧ It's not an easy process, it takes a lot of hard work and effort from both of you to make it as smooth as possible - focusing on the future and a positive outcome for all concerned.
✧ Emotional intelligence is key - it is not a time for point scoring and I'm not a referee!
✨ How can we do this ?
Emotional Processing
... creating opportunities for each partner to share their emotions without judgement, prompting understanding and closure.
Support Network
... helping you both to identify friends, family, or support groups to lean on during the process as sometimes your circle changes.
Communication Skills
... the importance of setting boundaries to create healthy communication dynamics as you transition away from being a couple.
Personal Growth
... promoting strategies for self-care and personal development, helping both of you to heal and move forward independently.
Co-Parenting
... assist in creating a clear and practical co-parenting agreement that outlines responsibilities, schedules, and communication methods.
Future Planning
... helping each partner to identify personal goals and aspirations for their future post-separation, fostering a sense of hope and direction.
... with Delyth Cole